I always say to myself to never give in
Hope is always on the horizon
I just need to travel a bit further to reach it
Never give in, never! I tell myself
There is however so many times I can tell myself this
Knowing as each day goes on
A little more doesn’t happen
More words aren’t said than are said
If it were to be it would have happened by now
If the enthusiasm was even
What was hoped for would have occurred by now
It’s such a shame to give in, never give in I say
Not on a soul I may add
Just what is promised but never delivered
For reasons out of my control
If it were meant to be, the world would have let it happen
I know deep down I have given in
I have believed for too long now
Yet without a return from my shouts
I know what is done is done
I always believed I would never give in
But the pain has become too much
Every thought and every day
I pray it would be the day the promise arrived
After so long the heart cannot take much more
So much to say but the one not to say it to
I have given in on the hope that two hearts could collide
Yet I haven’t given in on the soul that helps my soul
The soul I speak of will never see what I have felt
Gone through the thoughts to be at that point to share the heart
It lays dormant now, the heart
It beats to keep the body living, not much else
I have given in, let the wind take my thoughts
Ready and willing for someone else to use them
Some promises are kept, some are just all talk
But like myself not all can be kept.
I went to sleep
Ready to dream
Of you
Because I love
You
With every part of my heart
I went to sleep
I dreamt of you
It made my day
Because you
Are beautiful
No dream is as good
As seeing you
For real
I went to sleep
Knowing I would dream
Of you
And about you
Because I love
Dreaming
Of
You.
Once a hope
Now a lost dream
Gone is the hope
And lost is my soul
The sight ahead
Blurred and unclear
I’ve lost the hope
And gained no dreams.
The only thing we’ve got in common
Is earth that we walk
How could I think that there was ever more
We walk the same paths
But in different directions
The only thing in common
Is the air that we breathe
Invisible to the eye
Just like the thoughts
That are within in my mind
The only thing in common
Is the same sun we share
To live our life under
The same sun that burns our skin
The only thing in common
Is the silence we both share
Common earth
Walking under our feet
It’s about all that we have.
Facebook says that you’re my ‘friend’
So in the street
Why don’t you say ‘hi’?
No need to turn your head away
Or try to look away from my face
In an awkward stare at the floor or sky
All I would do is say ‘hello how are you?’
It would seem
That just because something says
We’re ‘friends’
Doesn’t actually mean we are
I could walk past you time again
Look over to say ‘hiya’
But it would not matter
As we’re actually not real ‘friends’
Is this where we are at my ‘friends’?
It would appear so
My lost friends.
A place that taught so much
The basis for life
The life I was to lead from here
Yet the day finally came
When the school closes for good
The final chance to see where I learnt
Where memories will forever have a place in my mind
For I did not take the chance to see the school again
What good would it have done?
I have no bad memories I may add
But now it is a place I haven’t visited for many years
And will now never visit again
It however has made me think of the times had
The day that I gained my GCSEs on that hot summers day
One of the most joyous days I can think of
To where I first saw the sight of my first love
(Not in the curriculum, but we all have to take a break from the work),
From the start of each school day
We stood and met by the design technology block
Day in day out without fail (unless ill)
We would meet there and pass the time talking
Some of us had an affinity with the teachers
Speaking to them on a human level
Rather than a teacher only level
Mocked for who we were by some
A small group of friends
Who got through school together
School was all one way for me
Learning
Just like the one way system they introduced from year 9
What a havoc that was, what day did that idea end!?
The place taught me a lot
But maybe I left too soon, I admit
It was my level, my level of understanding
I could have achieved higher marks here than where I was to move
I look back and there were bigger and better characters than I
For I only wanted to achieve the best that I could
I look back and have little regret
Maybe to stay and continue my and achieve where I started
It would have been a thank you for the previous years’ support
But that was a choice and a choice now laid in history
Going back now would have done very little
From what I have seen, not many a face do I remember
Yet the school I learnt from
Has fewer days to remain as a school
The day is nearly here to demolish the bricks that stand
I never thought about school as much since being there
Now it’s going I have more fond memories than I thought I had
My first poem written in the English classroom;
‘Let Me Be’
From here led me
Inspired me to write what I feel
Convey the world and what I feel into words
Hearing of the bricks to be brought down
It has made me think a lot of the time there
I enjoyed my time at school
Even through the tough days, tough times
All I can do now is look back
Smile and remember
I wish you farewell
You taught me well.
Any further ideas I may have
I may just keep to myself
A lonely world I write in
Just isn’t worth the words I write
Any further ideas
Will just be ideas
There is not a need
To write them down.
No one will ever understand why I like this hill so much
It is after all just a hill, with a view of the city below
The larger hills in the background as clear as I have ever seen them
It’s peaceful up here, only a dim hum of the cars on the motorway
The view is in my eyes spectacular
Especially on a warm summer's evening like today
The sun shining and a slight cool breeze, but not much more
Through the trees I walk in the shade
The ground is dry unlike the last time I was here
Back then there was a foot of snow upon the ground
A sharp cold breeze and a much tougher walk than today
Through the shade of the trees you wouldn’t think it was sunny
Then as you walk the trees part their way
The world opens up into a sunny glorious view
I sit by the edge of the cheese roll and I look out at the view
No one will ever understand why I like it so much up here
Always something new to look at, find, admire
I have fond memories of here, first starting with scouting up here
Since then I have always more often than not been a lonely visitor to here
The walk clears the mind, the heart gets a work out from the ascent
It’s not mountain nor is it too easy, just a nice pleasant walk
With rewarding views at the end of it to help the mind think a little bit more
With the hill just on the doorstep I could visit so much more
However it makes it all worthwhile when I do get to visit
With the camera in hand each photo I take differs from one to the next
It will always be a part of me, although I will never understand why
A place I can call my muse shall we say, a thought provoking place
Why that hill I may say? I do not know, or need not worry why.
Mr Cooper was an elderly man
He was tall and had a good view on life
His eyes were in perfect vision
But his hair was thin on top
With a strange straight line of baldness on top
People went to him to visit him no matter what the weather
He was peaceful and had many stories to tell
He often liked a walk to the Black Horse Inn
But he was better known for looking out at the views
Mr Cooper is like a guardian to us all
He stands tall, proud and ever willing to give a helping hand
Like a branch of a tree, there to support and forever hold on
As the spring changes into summer, people gathered at his doorstep
They brought cheese but never any biscuits
He at times was overwhelmed with many visitors he received
But as quickly as they arrived they soon departed
Leaving him to be alone once more
Yet he never felt any loneliness as he knew they would be back
If you ever needed to share a pew he always had one
Often sharing his views on life with you
However leaving you to make your own mind up
Letting you be in silence, he would give time to think
Many people who visited stayed for a while, yet many were just passing by
Mr Cooper has time for anyone as long as they were polite
Just remember to say hello when you see Mr Cooper
Give him a smile, he’ll always wave back and wish you a good day.
Running back
I realise what I had
Despite running so fast
I could still see you
Looking back at me
Running back
Up the hill so fast
It took all my breath away
This is my muse
This is where I need to be
Running back
To the era, place and time
I know what I had
And all I have now is my muse
My muse to keep my mind alive
There’s not many who are a muse
Nor a fool would think of me
Forever running back
From the modern day
To the place I know I could be.
That night
After our first kiss
I lay there thinking of you
And wondered what you thought
My heart was screaming out for more
More answers, than kisses
That night
I didn’t sleep much at all
My heart racing
And wanting the world
To turn so I would fall to you
That night
My world had changed
Forever more
No night was ever the same
That night
I knew
It was you
Forever more.
Kiss me
What more do I have to say
Need me
What more do I have to say
Feel me
What more do I have to say
Believe me
What more do I have to say
Love me
What more do I have to say
Want me
What more do I have to say
Hold me
What more do I have to say.
No one hears the sadness in my heart
[imagine a still figure sat on a bench staring blankly straight ahead]
I could be sat next to you screaming out
[imagine that person sat like before but with you with a microphone screaming into their ear]
Holding a sign to tell you all I feel
[imagine me holding a sign next to you on that bench and you looking straight through it]
But you wouldn’t hear the sadness in my heart.
[silence]
When you admire
Someone from so far away
For so long
I wonder
What they would think
If I shared my thoughts
So many thoughts
Of admiration
Butterflies in my stomach
When I think of you
Telling you my inner thoughts
Releases an area
Of my mind
I thought I’d never let go
But at least you know now.
The shadow I create
Is a taller
Stronger
Person than I will ever be
The shadow may be dark
Looming in front of me
Or even following me around
The figure in the shadow
Always there looking on
Not always one to speak out
Just quietly seeing the world go past
I may not always say much
But I still care for you
I’ll always will be there to care for you
Maybe just not in the way I would like.
I never thought I’d feel like this again
My heart has sunk like a stone
Sinking to the bottom of the sea
I knew my feelings for you were strong
But now I realise how strong they are
The last time I felt like this it took time to dissolve the feelings
Now I feel the process of doing so starts again
I’ll see you at every occasion I can
It’s just that I won’t be able to tell you how I feel
My heart will be forever sinking
But buoyed by the fact you’ve seen the real me.
Our eyes meet from across the room
The world around me becomes silent
All I see is the beauty within your eyes
And at that moment nothing else matters
Until I have to look away
I’ll look into your eyes and see the beauty within.
Time to step away
Leave the thoughts to what I have
At the bottom of the stairs
Walk away.
My mind can’t cope
Cope with the thoughts of you
You make me want to shout out
Out to the world in joy
Joy for the feelings
Feelings I thrive upon
Upon my heart they lie proudly
Proudly I would give everything for you
You to be near me.
I was never meant to be in this world
There was a time shift in a single moment
That caused a change in the timeline of life
Something only equivalent to a nuclear bomb
It rocked my world until this very day
How life is now and what it could have been
I don’t live in regret
In the life that is now
But I can’t think what life would have been like
As it’s in a parallel world.
Crash! I fell to the floor, fists were thrown
Many bruises were laid upon our faces
It all started when I realised
You weren’t good enough for her
My heart was beating out of my chest
Ready for you to throw your next hit
No man shall ever hurt her again
I tell you now I have never felt so angered
Crash! Each hit is another reminder
Why you aren’t good enough for her
I will fight for you.
I love you
Can’t you see that
My heart throbs
From my chest
For you
I love you
Words that don’t mean a thing
To anyone else.
Put my heart in a picture frame
& that will be your present.