The Heart of Four Chambers

‘A community spirit we must pass on’
‘A handwritten letter never posted’
Equation 1
‘May the sun rise for I to be laid to rest at 11am’
‘A broken spell’
‘Unique broken pieces’
‘The heart of four chambers’
Equation 2
‘The frustration of time’
‘ Life’
‘Only one kiss is good enough’
‘Two hearts’
Equation 3
‘The world at my feet and in my own time’
‘The patience of three weeks’
Equation 4
‘Dialling the numbers to a lost friend’
‘Time: It passes & tomorrow starts today (for the better)’
‘A summer waiting by the window’
Equation 5
‘Talking through the night’
‘A unique you’
‘Future is time’
Equation 6
‘An infinity of love’
‘A broken half’
‘Counting the time’
Equation 7
‘A drink to find thee’
‘A clear path in life’
Equation 8
‘Your eyes speak more than your heart’
‘A unique person remains the same’

1. ‘A community spirit we must pass on’

A community must survive by numbers,

No matter how small they may be,

Community is where the heart is,

And no number can or will be placed upon that,

At the heart of the fayre,

I stand still and look around,

Holding my daughter in my arms,

Seeing people of every age,

Wondering if the young,

Will continue the work of the present,

People survive by being friends with eachother,

And looking around the room,

This is true as I see,

In a place that breathes hope,

A community comes together,

Living and breathing as one,

As my daughter is handed soft toy,

Out of the goodness of a kind heart,

The smile from one to another,

And then the smile returned,

Creates a happy place,

Where kindness rules above anything else,

A generation here can teach everyone something,

That we are to be here as one community,

And the young must learn,

That this is the heart,

Where life breathes for many people,

In numbers we are a stronger community,

And as one belief,

We will share our thoughts with the young,

To help them continue the heart of this life we have.

2. ‘A handwritten letter never posted’

The handwritten letter,

Never was it posted,

Words gathered on the page,

Making sense to the eyes that wrote it,

Ever hopeful the addressee would see it someday,

It sits within the envelope,

Addressed to your {house number},

Stamped with the queens head,

Ready to be posted,

Yet it never was,

The words written,

Remain enclosed in the envelope,

Maybe never to be read,

As they may never be understood,

What is written is true,

But somehow doesn’t have a place,

In this lifetime we live for now,

So the words in the envelope,

Will have to wait,

Until the time is right, if ever,

To be posted,

And read by the person it is addressed to,

A handwritten letter,

Beautifully written,

Yet it may never be posted,

To the beauty who it is for.

3. Equation 1

4. ‘May the sun rise for I to be laid to rest at 11am’

My final request,

To be buried at 11,

As it was 11 when I lost you,

My heart is already in the ground,

And so it has been for many years,

Covered in earth and hidden from life,

I would like to lie,

For one more night,

To see the morning light,

Rise above the hills,

(that surround Gloucestershire),

The following morning (I request),

Buried with a view,

Overlooking you,

To keep you safe and well,

Until you lie next to me,

11 to be laid to rest,

By the time you be next to me,

We’ll be lying astern,

Creating the time,

As if it was 11,

With you next to me,

As I am lowered,

My heart will be reunited,

With the body of a lost soul,

As now I can rest,

And look out at the view,

Spending my time waiting for you.

5. ‘A broken spell’

I fell under your spell,

Not just once but many times,

With my eyes only for you,

I was blinded by evil,

And a spell to match,

This evil spell,

I needed to break it,

Putting me back,

Into my own world,

To see my actions,

And the influence you had,

Over me,

A spell broken,

Forever more.

6. ‘Unique broken pieces’

My heart is broken into 7 pieces,

Each piece unable to be fixed,

Despite trying to glue it or stick it,

It always falls apart,

Never properly fitting as it should,

And what was originally there,

Has now gone it would seem,

And the pieces merely make a picture,

Full of cracks and distorted views,

Seven pieces lie distinctly on the floor,

How each piece I see is unique,

Shattered edges and shaken memories,

They will never fit together again,

If the pieces could speak,

What would they say,

To help me put them back together,

So sharp are the edges,

I dare not ask,

That the pain at that level,

Come back again,

For I couldn’t face again,

The seven pieces picked up,

Placed into one place,

To be one day put together,

When the memories,

Aren’t so painful.

7. ‘The heart of four chambers’

Four chambers of my heart,

One for each of you,

Written on the wall of each chamber,

Are the words of love I have for you,

Forever within my memory,

My heart and the life I lead,

As the love within each chamber,

For each of you I have,

Is what keeps me alive,

If each of the four chambers,

Spoke to another,

A thousand thoughts,

With many more feelings to speak of,

Would be shared,

Yet no one chamber,

Can I love more than another,

Four chambers of my heart,

Each one filled with joy, happiness,

And eventual tears and dashed dreams,

But that chamber of the heart,

Is and will always be for you.

8. Equation 2

9. ‘The frustration of time’

Frustrated by time,

It will never let me love you,

As I should do,

Forever time flies,

With no mercy,

For what I feel for you,

The seconds tick by,

The frustration builds up,

As I only want to love you.

10. ‘Life’

I've known of you for over my life,

Yet I never really got to know you,

After our lives went different ways,

Each year that passes,

I think about you,

And where you are now.

of me wants to see how you are,

The other of me repels the idea,

For it is now not the time,

To think of the life that has gone,

But now to think,

Of the life ahead,

Where are you now,

For the of my life I have known you,

Is half a life,

Spent loving you,

A life loving,

Yet a life not knowing,

You or what would have been.

11. ‘Only one kiss is good enough’

I could have been kissed by twenty one,

But never would one of them,

Could ever be you,

As you are the one and only,

I have ever truly let my heart fall for,

A thousand kisses,

And many more thoughts,

One in the world,

Are you to me and me alone,

A kiss may be that it all be,

But you and I,

Would never be two souls,

Just one soul,

Living in a heartfelt world,

Never would there be many,

Because there just isn’t,

As you are the one true heartbeat,

That my heart feels each beat,

Twenty one?

Just make it one,

That one,

Is you.

12. ‘Two hearts’

Two hearts,

With my,

One mind,

To choose,

Which heart,

To break,

In two,

When two,

Hearts beat,

The same,

As mine,

Yet one,

Can only,

Beat next,

To mine,

Causing pain,

For one,

And heartache,

For three.

13. Equation 3

14. ‘The world at my feet and in my own time’

When I was 23,

I must have been alive,

The world at my feet,

I went out to meet it,

Yet how the world,

Was changing behind me,

As I walked across many foreign lands,

It was like the speed of time,

Had increased ten fold,

The world behind,

Changed beyond my control,

Yet this was the world,

I was meeting in my own time,

It did not matter what else occurred,

Because no one told me the changes,

Of time beyond what was in my knowledge,

As time changes wherever I am,

But the world I live,

Was as important here,

As it is where I call home,

The one world behind me,

And the other world in front,

I gave all I could for now,

As at 23,

This chance may never occur again.

15. ‘The patience of three weeks’

Three weeks to wait,

Until you and I saw again,

When week one past by,

I never thought it would be the end,

That I would speak to you again,

If time was worth waiting for,

It was you that I waited for,

Yet the week came and went,

Week 2 and I knew,

Life would never be the same,

Then in week 3,

Was to be perfection,

When instead,

It was just another week,

How bleak it was,

Three weeks to wait,

I couldn’t last for one,

For you,

When all I lived for,

Was you,

All I breathed for,

Was us,

Three weeks went by,

And I,

Never saw perfection,

Like you and I again.

16. Equation 4

17. ‘Dialling the numbers to a lost friend’

I started to shake,

Become nervous I did,

As I hadn’t spoken to you,

For what felt like a lifetime,

Picking up the telephone,

Was only the start,

Dialling the numbers,

Was if I was diffusing a bomb,

Slowly and steadily,

0..1..

4..5..

2...

The numbers displayed,

The tone dialled,

I waited,

Waited,

5 rings had gone by,

I didn’t know if you would answer,

Click,

The phone was answered,

It was you,

The lost friend at the end of the numbers dialled,

Now I had to find the right words to say,

This moment I had,

May be no more than a few minutes,

But those words,

Would shape the future,

On hearing your voice,

I became happier in an instant,

My time was now,

To ask how you are.

18. ‘Time: It passes & tomorrow

starts today (for the better)’

Ten toes,

Two feet,

To find you,

Twelve years past by,

Today another day,

Tomorrow may be the day,

The 21st of the month,

That I travel to you,

Thwarted by memories,

Today I fall to the floor,

Times are remembered,

That this moment,

Is when time changed,

Throughout time passed,

Thoughts passed my mind of you,

Thinking of where we would be,

If twelve years passed by,

Should have been,

Standing tall next to one another,

Time has gone,

Tomorrow starts again in the morning,

Thoughts must think forwards,

As today and tomorrow,

Will not replace the twelve years past.

19. 'A summer waiting by the window’

Come and see me some day,

I live at number 18,

For a summer I waited,

Patiently and positively,

Every day by the window,

To see if you were to visit me,

Each day the weather differed,

Rain fell, the sun shone,

But you never came by my way to my house,

Had I said the right number?

Number 18 could sound like 38,

If your mind hears anything like mine,

The summer past by,

And you never came to my house,

Not even to say hello,

A summer waited,

A summer wasted,

Why did I think you’d come my way,

Ever hopeful,

As I like to think I am,

When summer was nearly over,

I realised you’ll never call by,

So I placed my feet into my shoes,

Opened the door,

And walked,

For a very long time,

Hoping instead,

I would call by you.

20. Equation 5

21. ‘Talking through the night’

4am,

I’d been up all night,

Speaking to you,

Because I didn’t want to do anything else,

The alcohol consumed,

Started to reside,

The mind over thinking,

All night,

4.01am as I saw the clock changed,

Your eyes tired,

You fell asleep,

However sleep was far from my mind,

I could only think of home,

And home I went,

4.04am and I put the blanket over you,

To keep you warm,

I then crept out,

As I did not want to wake you,

I paused to smile before I left,

A night talking to you saved my soul,

By 4.09am I was on my walking to home,

I did not live far but after tonight it felt twice the distance,

My mind was dancing with you,

4.20am I was home and laying in bed,

My eyes did not want to close,

Just in case I forgot the night spent talking to you,

4.24am and my eyelids heavy with tiredness,

I tried with all my might to keep my eyes open,

The clock changed,

4.25am and I was asleep,

In a world of my own dreams,

With you in the forefront of my mind,

Hoping as you slept,

You dreamt and thought the same way.

22. ‘A unique you’

For every 1 of you,

There would be ,

In excess 15,000,0000 people,

That wouldn’t even come close,

Yet you may not see,

The two eyes that look at you,

In complete admiration,

Because that is all I am in your presence,

I see,

I admire,

I count my heart beats,

As I don’t want to forget,

What it is like,

Being with you,

(Albeit sitting next to you),

(As I can never be with you),

You are,

One in a million,

One in a billion,

Or even one in a lifetime,

You are the only one.

23. ‘Future is time’

Future is time itself,

Unsettled as of yet,

Unseen by anyone,

But time to be lived,

And how is up to the mind,

Future is time,

And time is my future,

Unseen,

But must be believed,

A lot of faith,

Hope,

And dreams,

Are placed upon,

Something that isn’t seen,

Until the future arrives,

May it arrive today,

Tomorrow,

Or when it is ready,

As the future,

Will not wait,

For too long.

24. Equation 6

25. ‘An infinity of love’

The further away that you are,

It makes me think more about you,

And the more I feel for you,

As distance divided by love,

Would be some sort of infinity,

It does not matter where you are,

Or how far away that you are away,

I will always have love for you,

My heart will never be divided,

By anyone else,

As I will not share my heart,

With anyone but you,

So no matter,

Where you are,

I will be here for you,

With an infinity of love.

26. ‘A broken half’

Love for one,

& for two,

Can be true,

Equally loved,

Yet the heart must side with one,

Resulting in half a heart broken,

Within my chest,

With a whole heart,

Elsewhere,

Broken without ever seen again,

A whole heart,

Not just 12,

Yet painful it is,

Love for one,

It must be,

As love for two,

Could never work,

Without a break,

Of the heart,

Never mind,

If it is 12,

Or a whole heart,

A broken heart,

Is still a broken heart.

27. ‘Counting the time’

I've spent enough minutes,

Chasing after you,

As each minute I counted,

I am now lost in hours,

Days become weeks,

And the mind is lost in a year,

I count again,

But time wasted,

Counting wasted time,

Is enough to tire the mind,

It’s time,

The reset the clock,

Making note of the time,

Instead of counting every minute, hour and week,

As life cannot be wasted,

Counting the time.

28. Equation 7

29. ‘A drink to find thee’

One,

Two three,

Drink for me,

I'll be with thee,

A few more sips,

And 5,

I’m not with thee,

Soon 5 becomes six,

And no,

I am no closer to thee,

My mind is filled,

With thoughts of you,

Flowing quicker,

As number seven,

Sets into the mind,

It takes me back to thee,

One too many,

And the eyes slip into darkness,

Waking without thee,

But thinking when will the next drink will be.

30. 'A clear path in life’

Looking back from where I stand,

Three paths lay before me,

But they just aren’t a countryside path,

That a normal eye would see,

I see more than the paths that they are,

They represent what has been and is in life,

Two paths are overgrown,

And difficult to walk again,

Yet given the chance,

I would walk them again and again,

But that is now impossible,

As the paths are impassible,

The brambles would hurt,

Like the thoughts and memories,

But the pain I know would be worth it,

Just to have the chance to live next to you again,

The other path I see and stand upon,

As clear as the sun shines in the bright blue sky,

The path clearly walked over the years,

A long path that would take a lifetime to walk from start to end,

With a few fallen trees as challenges along the way,

To challenge the mind and heart as it lives and breathes,

Never is there too much time,

To walk back over what was,

But it keeps the path clear,

I look back at all three paths,

Clear or not,

They are the paths that I have come from.

31. Equation 8

32. ‘Your eyes speak more than your heart’

Your eyes tell me you love me,

But your heart won’t speak to me,

I can read your eyes,

Like a well written novel,

But you must tell me the ending,

If I looked into your heart,

Would I see the same as the eyes,

Or is this just what the eyes believe,

Your eyes tell me you love me,

Please let your heart be the same,

My heart beats in my chest,

Wanting to escape to tell you,

I merely love you,

Merely? Just merely?

How ridiculous,

This is anything but merely,

With a pair of eyes each,

And two hearts beating together,

I fear the the world is between us,

Not letting your heart speak to me,

Even though your eyes tell me everything,

(Well almost everything),

The novel read,

Not just once,

But twice,

To try to read the ending,

My heart will beat until the end,

Solely fixed upon your eyes,

As they tell me you love me,

And I don’t just merely love you,

I love you.

33. ‘A unique person remains the same’

You remain the same,

The person is the same,

Unique as the one that you are,

The mind is tired,

It forgets,

Forgets,